No Joy. Day 393.

When one tests negative after COVID, it does not mean the fun is over. Trust me. It’s known for lingering beyond its non-existent welcome, as we all are aware, and I’m seeing it firsthand.

I am recovering and feeling better every day. My experience with it has been quite mild compared to some stories I have heard. I have a small, infrequent cough that will be gone soon, I feel tired still, and every now and then I smell faint scents like the fresh air coming through the front windows and my hand soap. I want to do all of the things! I can’t, though, and am slowly recognizing and respecting it, but I must address my impatience constantly and not allow it to affect my moods.

One thing people don’t talk about is the depression. We are experiencing the most gorgeous weather maybe since we’ve been back in North Carolina, but all I want to do is watch TV or read. I do not have the energy or desire to do anything else. I could be winterizing the gardens, taking a trip to have lunch at the beach, or even walk a few laps around the property. I’m simply too tired, but each day I have more energy.

I write this to read later. It makes my feelings more tangible. You can’t address or repair something that doesn’t exist, something that may only “be in my mind.” Each day gets better and if I squint hard enough I can see the end of this and the beginning of my body’s repair. This, too, shall pass.